Who wants to be more miserable in life?  Apparently more people than you think.  The Vancouver Public Library recently hosted a 90 minute presentation on the topic.  Guess how many people attended. 13?  27?  52? 116? 183.5?  200?  or more??!  What do you think?

My estimate is 200 or more.  It was a packed house and many had arrived early to ensure a good seat.  Imagine that!  You may think it unusual for people to be excited about misery but we humans are a highly complex species not easily understood.

While waiting for the session to begin, we were asked to fill out an optional questionnaire, listing 3 things we could do to increase misery in our personal life.  These strategies had to be something within our control.  The presenter stated he was collecting responses for a future book he plans to write.

While pondering this question, I noticed much laughter and conversation in the room.  It appeared that this group had a lot of work to do to become more miserable!  At that moment, a well-dressed woman with crutches and only one leg entered the room.  An elderly woman offered her seat in the front row.  “No, thank you” insisted the one-legged woman as she made her way back to a seat she eyed in the second row, four chairs in from where I sat.  She flashed me a pleasant smile as I pulled my legs and body back to make room for her.  A companion followed right behind and quickly placed a cushion on her friend’s chair.  I mused at the sight of the puffy red cushion and thought it would be a good strategy for increasing happiness, not to mention comfort!

All around me, people engaged in spirited chatter.  Strangers struck up conversations with others who sat in front, behind and beside them.  Apparently people were greatly amused by the subject.  I contributed my thoughts to the conversations around me.  My strategies for increasing misery were: #1 Hang out with grumpy people.  #2 Neglect my personal needs.  #3 I can’t remember at this time, but I am sure it will come to me!

As you may have guessed, the presentation was really about how to be more happy in life.  It was confusing to experience this backwards approach to the subject.  My brain felt blocked at times, like it had been turned upside down and immersed in a cloudy solution that impaired my mind’s ability to process information.  In reality, reverse thinking is actually very good for our brain.  It clears old cobwebs and powers up neurotransmitters for those snappy synapses to fire into action!  Oh, it seems to be working now.  I recall my third strategy for increasing misery, which is to isolate myself.

According to the presenter, the top three ways to increase misery are:   #1 Perceive yourself as not good enough.  #2  Allow your emotions rule.  #3 Be like everyone else.  There you have it.  Any day that you are feeling a little bit too cheery, try one of these strategies or create your own and see what happens.  I suspect laughter will arise from this experiment.  Live life backwards for a refreshing approach to happiness!

If you are a regular visitor to this blog, you already know that one of my favourite activities is cycling through the forest.  The fresh scent of pine and endless varieties of vegetation comprise one of mother natures’ grandest gardens.  Ferns, mosses, and wild mushrooms of all shapes and sizes spew forth from rocky cliffs, steep hillsides and lofty trees towering overhead.  This luscious landscape is truly one of the most magnificent and magical on our planet.

Maneuvering my bike through endless trails is an exhilarating experience, especially when the path is littered with hazards leading to surprising drop-offs.  Total focus is necessary if I am to complete the ride intact.  No longer a carefree young person who believes she is invincible, I carefully make my way down the path with nervous trepidation.

Embarking on challenges like this is no different than striving for personal growth in other areas of life.  It takes a certain amount of confidence to endure tasks beyond ones comfort level.  Where does confidence come from when one feels they do not have enough courage within?  The answer is from others.

Enlisting the support of another can be worth its weight in gold.  My son, a more skilled rider than I, accompanied me on this ride.  He provided me with the support I needed to complete the journey successfully.  Timely riding tips and warnings of upcoming hazards helped me to prepare myself for what lay ahead.  In addition, he alerted wildlife of our presence.  Thankfully there were no hungry looking carnivores on this trek!

Personal growth requires a certain amount risk.  Know that stretching yourself does not need to be a solo journey.  In fact, having a support person can enhance the experience significantly.  As 1930’s explorer Everett Ruess once said, “A true companion halves the misery and doubles the joys.”  It is true.  Growing through life can be easier and more fun when accompanied by another who is ready to cheer you on and celebrate each small success along the way.

We emerged from the trail with smiles on our faces.  I felt euphoric over my accomplishment, with only a spattering of mud and tiny black bugs on my jacket.  I looked back to the forest and noticed a sign that said “No trespassing”.  Oops!  There were no signs at the start of the trail, which brings me to yet another life lesson.  Hindsight is always 20/20, revealing a new and different perspective seldom anticipated.  Glance back in life from time to time to reap those lessons and commit to your journey forward, as that is where your own true magnificence awaits!

Imagine an orchestra playing a  magnificent symphony.  Imagine this orchestra being your brain!  You may have heard that we have a left brain and a right brain.  Each allows us to think in different ways.  The left brain supports linear thinking and logic while the right brain supports abstract thinking and infinite possibilities.  Both offer a significant piece to the grand symphony of our mind!

Recently, a sculptural artist approached me and asked how he could explore the depths of his creativity without losing himself to his project.  After hours of creating, he shared that he sometimes feels dazed and unsure how to transition back to reality.  Too much abstract thinking can transport a person to another realm without realizing it.  How can one stay grounded while delving deeply into the wells of creativity?  The answer is through mindfulness.

Mindfulness brings awareness to the realities of the current moment.  As an artist accesses the depths of their right brain, they also need to maintain connection with their left brain.  Being human involves physical limitations as our body signals fatigue and the need for rest.  Conversely, being creative involves no limitations and requires left brain thinking for continued wellness, especially during creative spurts.  A symphony of the mind occurs when both right and left brain work together to yield a “mind-blowing” performance like no other.  No pun intended!

It was  midnight when I was awakened by rustling sounds outside my open bedroom window.  I immediately thought it was a racoon but the heavy breathing suggested otherwise.  I peered out to see a very large black animal lumbering down my garden steps.  It appeared massive as it crossed below me and emitted a distinct odour from the wild.  I shivered at the sight of him and felt immensely grateful that I was safe, two stories above.

Mr. Bear was on a mission, foraging for food no doubt.  Finding none in my back yard, he attempted to climb over my fence to continue his quest.  His immense size made it difficult for him to scramble over.  Instead of gaining altitude, he pulled my fence back and forth until it began to wobble like an ever-expanding rubber band.  Of course, this didn’t last long.  It was just a matter of time before this once solid structure came crashing down.  I’m sure I heard him grunt “Onward Ho!” in a very deep voice as he trampled onwards into my neighbour’s yard.  No fence was going to stop him from getting to his next meal.

The fence was merely a hindrance for him, just another obstacle in his day.  He perceived no limits with what I perceived as a solid barrier.  How many times in life have you held limiting beliefs, seeing no way out of a predicament.  Mr. Bear shows us that when there is a will, there is a way.  What may seem impossible may indeed be possible, if we open our mind to it.  Albert Einstein once said “Imagination is more important than knowledge.”  Let go of what you do know and imagine the possibilities.  Just like Mr. Bear, you will get your cake and eat it too!

Awe is a state of wonder.  Awe can happen anywhere, at any place and any time.  Awe makes you stop in your tracks and ponder the oddness of a particular situation.  That was where I was when I last visited my dentist for a regular check-up.

“Open your mouth wide” said the hygienist.  “Awwww!” I said in response as she stuck a plastic plate into the side of my mouth to prepare for an x-ray.  Sally stepped out of the room so as not to be harmed by the radioactive waves.  She had placed what felt like a 50 pound shield upon me to protect my body, but “What about my brain” I pondered.   What protects the area above my teeth that houses my intellect?  I was awe-struck, pondering this odd predicament.  Why are my wits not protected?  Why didn’t she give me a 50 pound helmet to armour my wits?  After all, it is the all-important organ that is my CPU.  That’s computer language for computer processing unit.  It controls all of my body’s actions and thoughts.  Confusion replaces awe.

Awe returns as I look towards the ceiling, where a television has been mounted.  If I were an alien visiting from another planet, I would be in awe of where human’s place tv’s.  So there I was, lounging in a recliner with 50 pounds of armour on top of me while radioactive waves zipped through my head.  Lo and behold, another moment of awe struck me as I watched the screen above me.  A new baby was born.  Ahhh!  The gangly red being howled with flailing limbs as the doctor cut the umbilical cord, the thread of old life severed to begin anew as a completely separate being.

With every end there is a beginning.  Every moment holds an opportunity to start afresh.  What will it be for you?  Hold awe in the world and be open to what comes.  Insight awaits you, even as you sit idly in a dentist chair.  Ahhh!